How Our Worries Interfere with Bedtime

Several months ago we had a 3-hour bedtime routine, which was unusual for us at the time. And for about 30 minutes of it I was completely lost in "future worry." I was worried about how tired she would be in the morning, knowing how tired she's been for the past couple of days; I wondered how she was going to enjoy the play date she'd been looking forward to the next day; I was worried about how our morning was going to go, etc. For 30 minutes I was frustrated and annoyed because I was worried about tomorrow.

I don't know what happened, but suddenly I remembered that tomorrow isn't what matters. What matters is RIGHT NOW. Right now she can't sleep. Right now she's restless. Right now she needs me to accept her...right now, where she is.

I cuddled up and said, "I'm so sorry. I've been so worried about you tomorrow I forgot that I have you here with me right now."

She cuddled up close and told me she felt like crying. She felt like she had tears stuck inside. She said she didn't know where they came from. Maybe from her busy day, maybe from me.

I listened and listened. And when she seemed done I told her she can lean back and let the tears go. She decided to "pluck them from" her eyes and let them go that way. She chatted a few minutes longer, then drifted off to sleep.

It's easy to get so caught up in fear and worry that we forget about right now. On this night I was grateful for the gift of sudden awareness of all that matters right now - right now.

My child, my mirror, my teacher. ‪#‎gratitude‬

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