We all need support as we nurture our children and ourselves.
What is parenting beyond punishment?
Parenting beyond punishment is a whole-child, collaborative approach to raising children and nurturing relationships. It encourages parents to see their children BEYOND their behaviors so that they can respond neurodevelopmentally appropriate ways aligned with each child's unique cognitive, developmental, emotional, social and sensory needs.
Parenting beyond punishment is about building long term, healthy parent-child relationships rooted in love, trust, agency, autonomy and respect. Parents offer guidance by modeling empathy, recognizing underlying support needs, and collaborating on solutions that respect everyone's needs and agency. Rather than trying to control children's behavior with bribes, yelling, and punishments, families choose to guide versus control, listen versus assume, connect versus isoate, teach versus punish, encourage versus demand, and respond versus react.
It's a TALL order. And while it does take conscious effort, it does not require perfection. We can learn right alongside our children, and take the lead by taking responsibiity for our own learning, our own healing, and our own imperfections.
Why choose to parent beyond punishment?
When adults focus on long term goals that center on healthy life and relational skills, they are able to better respond to their children in ways that help them grow into adults who are emotionally regulated, intrincially motivated, critical thinkers, respectful of themselves and others, compassionate, and resilient. And adults get the added benefit of experiencing healing from their own relational hurts as they grow and learn alongside their children.
How does parenting beyond punishment work?
As a non-punitive parent, the focus is on helping children understand themselves, identify their support needs, and discover solutions to problems. Rather than being punished for mistakes and problems that arise, children have the opportunity to learn from their mistakes and try again until they master the skills along their growth and development.
Who benefits from parenting beyond punishment?
Non-punitive parenting principles benefit people of all ages and relationships. Interacting with others in respectful, accepting and cooperative ways leads to finding solutions that work for everyone, including spouses, family, friends, neighbors, educators, and colleagues.
